The way it actually works is that they send me totally unsuitable jobs. There are plenty of jobs for HGV drivers in Walsall. The only trouble is that I don’t have an HGV licence and I live at the other end of the country. Nearer to home, there are plenty of jobs for financial analysts, but I’m not a financial analyst.
More bizarrely, they sent me details of a job as a DJ for a gay, black radio station – or, rather, I imagine they mean a radio station for gay black people. Do they know something I don’t? As far as I am aware, I’m white and heterosexual and, with some exceptions, my favourite music isn’t much more recent than Handel.
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A few years ago, I’d have suspected that this was a machine translation, but I don’t think there is a translation engine out there which would make such a hash of things. Certainly Google’s translation software would have made a much better job of it. I can only assume that there is somebody out there with a very exaggerated idea of his or her command of the English language.